During our interview with Joel Crouse he said,“I think I raced to grow up a little bit.” This really stuck with me.
Lately, it’s finally weighing on me that I feel way older than 21. Growing up, I always heard a variation of “you’re so mature for your age.” There’s no way I could disagree, I am really mature for my age. I firmly believe that when you lose someone (or go through something big) at a young age, there’s a really big chance you’re going to grow up, and grow up fast.
I knew things at 10 that most people are just starting to figure out in their mid-twenties. I relate more to people who are a couple years my senior than I do to some of my friends. I have a deep appreciation for life.
I know life’s value because I know how much of a toll a loss takes.
There are many moments when being more “mature” has helped me. I’ve always been conscious of my responsibilities, I was able to take care of my grandmother because of this and there’s no way I would’ve started Too Damn Young if I wasn’t who I am today.
The way my life’s played out — personal decisions, life events thrust upon me — they all add up to who I am today. But, sometimes, I have to remind myself that I am only 3 months away from being 22.
Sometimes I need to have pity parties; just let myself sit in the sucky parts of life for a little bit. Sometimes I need to just think about having fun and not feel guilty about it.
Being forced to remind myself that I’m actually young is hard. It’s not something most of my friends can relate to. It’s frustrating and overwhelming and incredibly real.
I don’t know if I would have slowed down the race to grow up, but knowing what I know now about life and how short it can be, I’m making really living a priority.
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