After my dad passed away, a lot of things changed. After you lose someone you love, your perspective changes. Things that should have always been important have finally gained the appreciation they deserve.
1. Always Say “I love you.”
No matter the circumstance, my family and I always end our conversations with “I love you.” Whether it was a quick call to remind my mom to buy me cereal at the grocery store or an argument with my sister about borrowing clothes, we always say “I love you” before hanging up the phone or walking out the door. You never know when the last time to tell people you love them is going to be. Always, always say it.
2. Appreciate Tradition
Every family has its own set of traditions. Whether they be large holiday parties or weekend pizza nights, every tradition is important.
After you lose someone, these traditions become major parts of your life.
My family has a Christmas Eve party every year where my immediate and extended family get together and simply enjoy one another’s company. Throughout the years the parties have gotten smaller as family members pass away. When I look around the room, I notice the absence of these people. I imagine where they’d be sitting if they were there and the laughs they’d be sharing. Our family doesn’t get together as often as it should and at the end of every Christmas Eve, I wonder if the goodbyes shared are going to be the last ones. The traditions we share are moments in which we can really feel the love of family and losing a loved one proves these moments to be invaluable.
3. Love the Ones Who Love You
It is humanly impossible to always express all of our affection to the people we love. Along with that, all too often we focus our attention on those who don’t express the same dedication to us. When our energy and dedication is limited, why would we take affection away from the people who deserve it while giving it to people who may only be in our lives for a short time? While I am still guilty of forgetting this occasionally, I’m working on remembering who’s important. The people who have been and continue to be by my side, the ones who take the time to understand and listen to me, the ones who know what it means to love someone are the ones I need to focus on. They’re the ones who deserve my love.
4. Spend Your Time Wisely
This one is simple. When time is so limited and unpredictable, we all have the right to be whoever and do whatever we choose to, with some obvious exceptions to this rule. If something makes you happy, do it. It doesn’t matter if other people don’t see the value in what you’re doing. If it matters to you, it matters.
