There’s the you that exists before your loved one dies and then there’s the you that exists afterwards.
I was a kid and then my mom died a month after I turned 10. From that January 10th on, I don’t think I ever really felt like a kid again.
Then my grandma died 3 months after I turned 21 and I still haven’t figured out who I am after that. Maybe this is normal? To feel a little bit lost, a little bit out of place, but still feel okay in my skin.
These last few days have been especially hard on me because I’m coming out of the holidays and life’s changing for me in ways I hadn’t expected. So I’ve been slipping back to this image of a tablecloth being pulled from under a vase, the vase shaking, trying really hard to find its balance, but not being able to. At least not yet.
Today, I am holding on to the “at least not yet” because it means eventually will come. I will find my footing again. I guess it’s a reminder as to why my word for 2015 is faith.
Image: WeHeartIt
