In exactly one month my grandmother will have been dead for 12 months.
On March 10th, 2014 at 2:00pm she was alive. By 2:15, she wasn’t.
I don’t know how I’m going to feel on the 10th, or whether or not I will feel anything but numb. I know that today I pushed it so far out of my mind that I forgot there was an 11 month anniversary mass at Church.
I actually, 100% forgot.
When I got a text asking me if I was on my way home and reminding me that the mass was in an hour, I stood in the middle of the street and just wondered how it was possible that I forgot it was the 10th. Shouldn’t I have remembered this? Was I so afraid to sit with the feeling that I just pushed it away?
(If you have any answers, let me know, because I sure don’t.)
Image: WeHeartIt
