10 years, it’s been 10 years. I remember when 10 years was a big accomplishment — double digits!! Now, I don’t know what to think.
It’s been 10 years since my mom died and my life changed forever.
10 years ago I lost my childhood innocence and saw the world as a darker place. I think of all the things that have happened in those 10 years:
- I went to middle
- I went to high school
- I graduated high school
- I got my driver’s license
- I became a legal adult
- I went on my first date
- I had my first kiss
- I moved away for university.
So much has happened in 10 years and so much more will happen in the next 10 years and the 10 years after that as well.
There’s so much of my life my mom will never be here with me to experience.
She won’t see me get my first “grown up” job. She won’t be around to help me pick out my wedding dress. She won’t hold my child.
This anniversary could be the worst one yet; today, I’m split down the middle. I’ve officially spent an equal amount of time on this earth with my mother and without her.
I have decided though that this is an opportunity to celebrate the time I had with her and the lessons her death taught me.
Her death taught me:
1. To lean on family and friends because they will be there for you, whether it’s when you mess up, need someone to rant to or need a shoulder to cry on.
2. How strong I am. I can not only deal with whatever life throws at me but I can overcome it and come out stronger in the end.
3. Life isn’t fair. This is a fact that won’t change no matter how much I would like it to. I had to learn to look past the unfairness and find bright spots. I had to learn to focus on those instead.
4. LIFE IS A GIFT. This is the most important one for me — her death taught me that every moment counts. It reminds me to tell others to keep their people close. It reminds me to tell those I love that I love them.
I am forever grateful that my mother’s last words to me were the same as my last words to her, “Goodbye, I love you”.
My mother’s death was a lifetime ago and just yesterday at the same time.
It was the worst moment of my life but it taught me the most about myself and I treasure every moment I had with her. So this anniversary I will honour the incredible life she had that ended too soon and the way she shaped me to be the woman I am today.
Comment below with words that can serve as hands Anna can hold today.
